Portends

This was Saturday's performance. It was a ten minute piece at the Black Cat Gallery in Century City, Ca. It was a decent show...more party than exhibit but I had five of the new works in it.

Emotionally this piece took it out of me. I've never been so down after a performance. So much underlying it...and by the time it was over I just wanted to get out of there.

Originally I was going to do something else entirely, but this was the one for this time. I could tell you what was behind it, but it really isn't necessary. The original image was from a shoot months before with three people who are very close to me. Little did I know what was to play out by the time September arrived...

I performed to "Von" by Sigur Ros and "Little Suicides" by Golden Palominos. Though I rarely place quotes or lyrics here, it would only seem appropriate that I use them now...

"it happens in the smallest ways
it happens all the time
but if you've never had your sight
what's it mean to be blind
now maybe they all just pretend to be
or maybe we're not trying
can't we just be happy for awhile
it happens all the time

all these little suicides
they hardly make a mark
I can take these fun-house rides
I'm a natural in the dark
I'm a natural in the dark
in the dark

if I could give you that
I'd give it all the time
you're just a little tired today
tomorrow you'll be fine
if love heals anything at all
we should be flying
if I could give you that
I'd love you all the time

you're everything I've ever wanted
you're everything to me
is there no stopping when it's started
these old hearts just come apart

it happens in the smallest ways
it happens all the time
if I'm not who I used to be
well, it's not to be unkind
and if you feel these aren't your better days
oh, I don't mind
can't we just be happy for awhile
it happens all the time"
-Little Suicides - Golden Palominos

a so-so recording of some of the performance done on a cheap powershot a85 since the actual videographer got high and vanished just before i went up